So, this boy I wrote about in the first two blogs... I haven't talked to him in some time now; since I wrote the second blog in fact. It's rather confusing to me because I don't necessarily know that I am really bothered by it. Now, I am somewhat bothered at the sheer fact that he was so adamant about: me going places with him, doing things with him, everything outside of visiting his girlfriend (which was understandable lol), and now it's as though I am nothing.
With ever bit of honesty in me, I never wanted to, or even intended to date this boy. I did, however, want to be better friends
with him. He's not the type (majority of the time) you just click with the first time you meet them. For the average person he is fairly withholding of himself, but once he opens up he can be alot of fun. I don't like to deal with those 'wishy-washy' type people though, and he was very much one of those.
In all my life, as short as it may yet be, I have yet to discover why people act differently around different people. The obvious answer is because they either want to please them with the way they act or they don't want them to disaprove of the way they would normally act. To me that is one of the most insulting and demeaning things a person can do to theirself. No person should ever be someone that they are not just because of someone else. No matter the situation.
This boy... He, very obviously, has trust issues. It makes everything all the more difficult because I can't find out why he has trust issues if he has issues with trusting me enough to tell me why he has issues with trusting people. Confusing enough for you? Haha.
I dunno. Life is happening for me. I may not know what to do with my life, but I'm not going to waste all my time worrying about him. You may be thinking that by writting these blogs I'm showing that there is something there. That I do, in fact, have some sort of deeper feelings for this boy, but I really don't. I have thoughts like these about many people, many boys I've been with. I just choose to share the thought and stories of this particular boy with you. You don't have to believe me, and i won't try and make you.
With ever bit of honesty in me, I never wanted to, or even intended to date this boy. I did, however, want to be better friends
with him. He's not the type (majority of the time) you just click with the first time you meet them. For the average person he is fairly withholding of himself, but once he opens up he can be alot of fun. I don't like to deal with those 'wishy-washy' type people though, and he was very much one of those.In all my life, as short as it may yet be, I have yet to discover why people act differently around different people. The obvious answer is because they either want to please them with the way they act or they don't want them to disaprove of the way they would normally act. To me that is one of the most insulting and demeaning things a person can do to theirself. No person should ever be someone that they are not just because of someone else. No matter the situation.
This boy... He, very obviously, has trust issues. It makes everything all the more difficult because I can't find out why he has trust issues if he has issues with trusting me enough to tell me why he has issues with trusting people. Confusing enough for you? Haha.
I dunno. Life is happening for me. I may not know what to do with my life, but I'm not going to waste all my time worrying about him. You may be thinking that by writting these blogs I'm showing that there is something there. That I do, in fact, have some sort of deeper feelings for this boy, but I really don't. I have thoughts like these about many people, many boys I've been with. I just choose to share the thought and stories of this particular boy with you. You don't have to believe me, and i won't try and make you.
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